Some might wonder, how comes I'm able to draw girls despite being a person with disability. Firstly I'd like to forgive their ignorance on thinking less of me in any form and secondly I'd back them up at the amusement. Because dating hasn't been easy for a whole lot and here I am as a person of disability whose had a success I've left them guessing. The obvious thought is I've lured them with money. Because poetry can be lucrative if you know just where to get the audience.
Having been able to perform at gala dinners and corporate events the idea sure fits. Some might think that maybe my poetic charms are doing their thing. But just like any guy out here whose a smooth talker, I don't need poems to charm my way. Though it's possible I've got a sweet tongue cause I come from the coast others might conclude. But all this stem from one aspect of me confidence with a personality that's hard not to notice.
From a young age I'd taught myself and mastered the art of confidence. This was as a result of good performances in school work, handy talents (cause from a young age I'd sing and sketch well) and coupled with being a fast thinker I had it all. But my secret tool had always been power of observation. Being that when I got injured I stayed in hospital for 4 months bedridden. That's enough time to lose one's mind.
What people felt like boredom during Covid-19 pandemic, was nothing compared to being helpless in the hospital. It taught me the skill of focusing my mind on things around me and trying to question everything. This sparked interest and with time I'd start learning people behaviours and patterns. It helped me know when to talk, when to crack a joke, and when to walk away. And when I got back to school, I had plenty of real life people to practice on and since practice makes perfect I became a natural.
It taught me how to keep a conversation, to be firm and to detach. Essential skills that in dating come really handy. And since I had success beaming my way, it was hard not to get noticed. But then comes the downside of my disability, appearance. In the dating world, impression is the first that comes to mind. I for one walk with crutches, that means a slight tilt on one side.
My strong suit will be when I'm seated cause you'd not notice the impairment. Appearance makes people dismiss you off from a far just as you dare come closer. So definitely I'd not be the one approaching since I didn't believe I stood a chance that way.
I'd spark interest by joining in on a group conversation, or by being silent cause curiosity would make someone take the initiative to reach out. And that's how it came to be that most of the bonds I had would be of people who were already impressed by what they've heard about me, or by the people I'm in the company of. And because once someone gets the chance to know me, I'm an instant vibe, I find myself having a smaller battle before I conquer hearts.
But recently ever since online dating became a thing, it's made the situation better for some and worse on others. Since I'm all chatty, I can easily have a great time with someone online. And as any other dating where we only show each other the good bits of ourselves, I don't easily share on my disability.
At times it's out of shame while most times is because you simply don't want it to end. Plus at times you not even sure if the bond will take off so why spoil it sooner. And that's why most of my pictures and poses are without crutches. Cause in the dating world one gets the chance to reimagine themselves hoping that they'd get to see the best side before seeing ugly side.
Most times if the conversation sparked interest and it was down to meeting each other, I'd opt to say it there and then or let it be an awkward surprise. Luckily it's never been that bad cause other than my crutches, I kinda have a great smile, hair ( dreadlocks) and lips (or so I'm told) that all is forgiven. I look better in person than in pics. That's why I prefer them seeing me in person rather than telling them on phone.
In my time,I've gotten to meet great people who were open minded. People who'd take me in for me while maybe some out of sympathy (cause they'd never tell me to my face) , some might have said no to being lovers simply because of the disability but they pretended not to like you so as not to hurt you even more.
Cause if you think rejection hurts, it hurts even more for persons with disability cause its hard not to shake it off your mind that you weren't considered all because of your disability. I noticed for those girls who've traveled, well read and have encountered disability before, have big hearts cause their love is genuine. And just like any other person, its that genuine love we all crave for.
The dating maze
I've been in and around the garden of love
Seated by the rose bushes waiting,
Waiting to see lovers come pick them
But everyone didn't come near cause of the thorns
They walked on to the hydranges
Some chosing to go for lavender
So why would they chose to be pricked
While the sweet jasmine was inviting
While other aisles were teaming with life
My aisle was all out empty
People in their numbers going for the easy picks
No one bold enough to take in the prick
And as I was walking away from the roses
One fine gentleman came along
All dusty with a lowered gaze
Went on and picked a rose flower
He didn't mind the thorns,
to him they were guarding the flower
He said if everything has a price, so does love
He didn't mind bruising for his lovers smile was a sight to behold
The PO£T